Reflections

Be careful what you pray for, you might just get it. After the break up and the brief reconciliation then final break up … He went away after two weeks and I was actually very fine. At that time I wished that he would just go away and stay away so I could be fin e…Guess what? When he came back, he said that he had been posted to Malvdives for one year! What was I to do but to wish him well? Imagine I couldn’t believe it. Its almost like God heard and answered my prayers …I felt like God was saying, “ Mess with my daughter and I will have you shipped to the other end of the world!” I still smile at this thought. Am still amazed that this is actually happening. But it is. I believe God just saved me inspite of myself. Funny something else that was going on within the brief time he was back and before he went. I noticed his closeness with another married woman …At first I though aaah its nothing but now thinking that otherwise, IF I didn’t it would make me the most naïve person ever. Espeially since I have been there and done the same things she does too…walking out of class to call when he isn’t in, making attempts to explain why he is not there or he is the one excusing me when am absent or why we are the ones passing that message . Shedding a tear or two over him while in class, ignoring everyone else just to walk and talk with him. The guilt trips. Moodiness. But she will get over it. I did. I mean after watching her, I thought. What on earth was I getting myself into? I must have suffered temporary insanity or simple foolishness. I mean I am the lucky one to be out of it! And crazy enough, I have realised that I am the treasure. I am the acre of diamond. I went out expecting him to be reassure not realising that all along, I hold the treasure within. Get me right, am not by any chance underplaying his value, because I believe being a treasure is recognising the treasure in others even if you aint with them. I have just learnt never to let anyone teat me less than I am worth. To listen to my spirit. To love myself first and to seek affirmation from within.